Inch by Inch

Size matters but it does not mean that “big” is essentially the right one.

Every centimetre counts.  When it comes to measurements we would always want to count the fractions.  We do not want to round off.  That means a quarter of an inch is essential especially if we are measuring our body parts.  That fraction of a number could mean something and could affect decisions.  Does that number need augmentation or reduction?

I am training a buddy for a month now.  He started out at 126 pounds in a 5 foot and 9 inch height.  The last time he stood on a scale, he weighed 132 lbs.  Last night, he asked me to take measurements of any development of his body.  I was not expecting great results yet but since he was all excited that he made it in a month, I was just as happy to oblige.

My housemates were already in our apartment when we arrived.  Being a familiar face, they welcomed him.  They even started throwing jokes on him which he took gladly.  I went to our room and took the tapeline together with the piece of paper where I copied the ideal body measurement for men.  The body statistics were based from wrist measurements.  I asked him to remove his shirt.  He obeyed ignoring my housemates who were watching us.

“Do you have your previous measurements?”  I asked him.  He nodded.

I wrapped the tapeline around his chest to start off the measurement.  There was a quarter inch increase.  Same result with his biceps.  His waistline did not change.  I told him that was good enough. When it came to his hip, I asked him to lower down his jeans.  He hesitated and looked at me.

“Ang tunay na lalaki ay hindi nahihiya maghubad.”  I told him, laughing.  The rest of the household agreed and started to heckle.  Challenged, he lowered his jeans.  I wrapped the tapeline around his hip, his crotch right into my face.  I told him the measurement.  I then proceeded to his thigh and calf.

“There are no significant improvements yet but the quarter inch increase in some body parts is already a good sign.”  I assured him.  My housemates heard it and commented on the result.  They throw in more jokes.  Unperturbed, he chided, “Di bale, malaki naman alaga ko.”  He grinned and took the tape demonstrating the length.  That made everyone, including me, challenged him to actually measure it in front of us.  We even told him our exact measurements.  He did not give in however.

Size matters but it does not mean that “big” is essentially the right one.  I think what really matter is to determine the size and accept it.  Big, small, long, short, thick, thin, fat or whatever it is, we somehow need to know this.  This is the only way that we can assess and make decisions.  If improvement is realistic then do something about it.  If not, then make the most of what we have and devise alternative ways to compensate.  The “right” one is the one that really fits.

I took the tapeline from the rookie and returned it to our room.  When I came out, I found the rookie sitting on the sofa with both hands on top of each other bringing them up and down against his crotch.  “What are you doing?”  I asked.  “I am just demonstrating to you how I jerk my cock off.”   He replied.  I chuckled realizing how this protégé of mine could get so obsessed with his size.